Inspiration

Sometimes we’re closer to our dreams than we think. This truth, this certainly recently became clear to me when I came upon a labyrinth. I’d only walked one once—the most famous one in the world in Chartres Cathedral in France. But I recently discovered one almost in my backyard. It’s nestled on the edge of our small community park. Inspired by all of its mysterious symmetry, I walked the circular paths and was struck anew at its teachings. It’s sometimes hard to see where your row is taking you, and when you think you’re farthest from the center—your destination—you discover you are actually only a few steps away.

The labyrinth shows the illusion of time and space so well, you see, and if you’ve never seen one or walked one, I highly recommend doing something about it.

Happiness is listening to the labyrinth.

As I continue to pursue my own dreams, I remind myself of the labyrinth’s teaching about time and space. I hold fast to the truth that I am closer than I might think to having what I want. I have been walking these paths for some time now in pursuit. I have to be closer to my destination by that sheer act of motion, right?

The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, I remember learning, and while that might be true, life doesn’t always feel like a straight line, does it? Sometimes we feel like we’re meandering. Sometimes we have no idea where the path is going. Sometimes we wonder if we aren’t taking the absolute longest route to our destination. And sometimes we fear we will wander aimlessly in circles forever and ever, and never reach it.

Take heart with me today and believe you are closer than you think. The labyrinth in all its perfect, mysterious symmetry tells us we are.

 

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I was going to write about something else. Then a snake crossed my path today, and after the day I’d had, I welcomed it. In case you didn’t know, snakes are ancient symbols of shedding what no longer serves us. Snakes shed their skin when they need to; it isn’t seasonal, something I found incredibly interesting when I’d learned it.

So, what’s being shed right now? More of all that “approval crap.” You know what I mean. You make an A in something, and you’re awesome. You don’t do so well, you feel like crap. That’s me not loving me.

Then there’s other people’s approval. You did what they liked, so they stay your friend. You don’t do what they like, all of the sudden you feel rejected and unloved.

Happiness is ditching approval. My own and others.

I’m willing to take responsibility when I turn the knife on myself, but I am also willing to acknowledge the knife others want to plunge into me and say, “No, sorry. Not this time. Not anymore.”

Approval is exhausting, and it ruins our happiness. Think about how your mood soured when you felt it yanked away from you last. One of my favorite spiritual teachers, Anthony de Mello, called approval a drug. We’re given it as a child, and we get addicted to it. Withdraw the approval, and we need even more of the drug.

His solution was to go through approval detox—my words, not his. Watch it for what it is, but step back from the grip. He mentioned there would be withdrawal symptoms, and boy, did I feel some of those painful ones today: a sense of loss, grief, anxiety.

So, shed with me. As much as you’re ready to, as much as you can.

I’m ready for a lot more happiness personally. What about you?

 

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Lately I’ve had a few people say they envy me, and it’s always a bit jarring when I hear anyone utter those words. A long time ago, I went from envying to admiring. It’s such a nicer energy. Then I came across this incredible wisdom and knew I was right to choose it. What you admire in another is already inside you.

I dream big. Always have. Always will. But I don’t just dream. I act. Some of these people who talk about envy admit they haven’t acted. What they say they envy is me acting. My answer is: how will you ever realize your dream if you don’t take the proper steps? Grace will only get you so far.

Still another person said not too many months back, “My Ava, you dream big.” I could hear the rancor in her voice, almost like she was chiding me for wanting more. And it bothered me for a while until I decided only I know what is best for me. If I want something, then I trust myself enough to know it’s from a place of love and joy. My response now is: I dream even bigger.

Happiness is dreaming bigger.

I once heard about a man who achieved all his dreams and didn’t know what to do with himself. Why didn’t he find a new dream? Life is ever evolving.

There are dreams I’ve realized, big dreams, the kind that involve becoming a bestselling author, the kind that come from having the most amazing friends, the kind that come from visiting some of the world’s most beautiful places. Yet still I say to myself right now: dream bigger. Who knows what might come?

Are you dreaming big? Are you acting? Give it a shot. It’s hard to be happy if you’re not.

 

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In all the toughest times in my life, one absolute truth has become evident. When I think I can’t take “it” anymore, support arrives just in the nick of time.

Anyone who’s experienced chronic pain in their body knows there is a point at which you think you can’t take it anymore. I hit that place recently. I’ve been there before, many times in fact, and even though I know pain shifts and changes, it’s hard to see the light, feel anything except the nausea-inducing grime covering your very skin, radiating out of your bones.

The next day one of my best friends called. I hadn’t heard from her for a couple of weeks, and honestly I had to make peace with the little hurt I felt because she hadn’t called. She knew I’d recently gone after a long-standing dream again and come up dry. Mind, body, spirit were all grieving that while the little voice in my heart said quietly, wait, it will come, don’t worry.

We talked on the phone, and I caught her up on “my story,” doing my best not to devolve into too much drama. Drama is never helpful. She’d said she’d waited to call until she could be fully there for me, and any lingering hurt evaporated. She cared. Of course she did! We are never truly alone, even when we don’t hear from those who love us.

The sharing was healing for us both. She’d been going through her own unraveling, what she called spiraling. I love this term because it’s a reminder that we are never back in the same place with a situation and the corresponding pain. We’re still moving up in our journey, coming back to it from a higher, different perspective. When I thought about it, I knew she was right.

When I got off the phone, I had five blissful hours pain-free, and it felt fantastic. How had this happened? Because I was heard, seen, and unconditionally loved. I was held.

Happiness is being held.

That’s true healing.

So shout out if you can’t take it anymore and be ready for support to show up. Someone, something will hold you. You need only be ready to relax and receive it.

 

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Some dreams don’t happen the first time. Becoming published certainly didn’t happen that way for me. There were twists and turns on that road, but I finally ended up reaching where I’d intended.

I have another dream I’ve been pursuing for some time now, and again, there have been some unexpected bends in the road. But I press on because I know I will reach my destination. I’ve promised myself that.

Happiness is Going Again.

It takes courage to keep pursuing our dreams. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard stories of people quitting after one try. Perseverance is the key. When I was on the road to publication, a wise writer once told me the only way I wouldn’t become published was if I quit. Wiser words were never spoken.

Of course, we’re all hoping to manifest our dreams and desires easily and effortlessly—first time around. I know I am. But when the road makes an unexpected turn again, I’m trying to lean back and enjoy the ride. That means not considering the bend in the road to be a detour.

What about you? Do you have the fortitude to pursue what you want no matter what? Are you living a life free of regrets? There’s nothing that will kill happiness faster than regret.

So, go again. Pursue that dream. Even if you’re at mile thirty, and you’re tired. Take a break and rest perhaps, but push on. You will reach it.

And oh, what a happy moment that will be.

 

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The call to greater happiness sometimes asks us to step out of our comfort zone. This is happening to me. I am being called to a new place, a new community, trusting it’s part of the higher vision of my life.

Following this call means letting go of what I’ve known, what I’ve built, what I’ve come to cherish. As I was leaving my beloved tea shop recently, I realized how much I am going to miss being able to dash over and find my favorite brews.

Many times in my life I’ve been asked to step off the cliff and trust that a bridge would be there to take me to the next peak. This time is no different. The promise of greater happiness awaits, but I must be willing to take the first steps. Commit to the journey.

Happiness is going to any lengths.

The comfortable can become routine, but for me it’s usually a routine I’ve chosen. New adventures abound now. No routines for some time. Discovering new favorite places. Finding new people and places to cherish.

It’s exciting and scary all at the same time in the way only big changes can be. And yet, I continue to hold the intention of truth: this is what I’m meant to do; this is where the greatest happiness lies.

There have been many sign posts along the way pointing to this new path. It has taken faith and courage to follow it. Oh, and trust. Loads of trust.

I am surrounded by people who support this change. They understand (mostly) that my path has been to follow the road less traveled, going to any lengths to reach the desired destination. My characters and I seem to be one in this, so life reflects art or vice versa.

“Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” by Dr. Seuss is one of my favorite books. That wise children’s book author knew what it meant to travel, to go to any length to reach our dreams.

Dreams are part of life, or at least they are mine. I can’t imagine not having something else I am excited to dream about doing. And of course the excitement and courage to follow the steps to manifest it—no matter what.

What have you been called to do that’s been out of your comfort zone? Has it led you to greater happiness? Is there a dream you’ve given up on? Or has something new been burning in your heart? Ask to see the signs to guide your steps and make the commitment with me to go to any length. We’ll dance on the top of the mountain together.

 

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Sometimes life simply boggles the mind in the best way possible. Just this past week, I came to a huge decision about the direction my life needed to take. I had that gut feeling, but I also asked the Universe for external confirmation this was the next step.

Look out! Confirmation came in a flood of awesomeness.

A friend I’ve known for over a year now ended up being associated with something about my decision. And I didn’t know about it until this weekend.

Then there were other signs. Literally the ones you see on the interstate or on the TV with the exact words you need.

Happiness is confirmation.

All doubt is blown away in these moments, right? Even if the new direction is really radical, well, we know down to our core it’s the right thing to do.

We pursue it with an open heart, trusting more support will come, and with more steps, more confirmation.

It has been a whirlwind since I made this decision, and I’m excited. Really excited.

What are you wondering about? What answer has been coming to you that you might feel more comfortable about if you had a sign?

My two cents: ask for confirmation.

You’ll get it.

And don’t be afraid to ask. You deserve an answer.

 

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This week I came across a term I had never seen before, but it suited me to a tee.

Grassroller.

Yes, you heard that right. I love to roll around in the grass, especially down a hill. I used to do it a lot when I was a kid, and truth be told, sometimes, I was rolling down a snowy hill, but you get the picture.

This old inspiration struck me some months ago, and since then, if I see a fabulous grassy hill and the mood comes upon me, I simply run up it and roll down, laughing the entire way.

Some people watching might think I’m crazy. Others have commented that it looks fun. Still more said they’re going to give it a try.

Whenever I do this, it makes me happy. I feel like a little kid again, unconcerned about people’s opinions, completely in the moment, finding delight wherever it takes me.

Happiness is Simple Things.

I could name other simple things that work for me. Playing with a yo-yo. Skipping. Throwing rocks into a river.

Sometimes we make being happy so big. It has to involve a big promotion or accomplishment. But there are happy moments to be had that need no fanfare. Kids know this and are our greatest teachers.

Get in touch with that kid you used to be. What simple things made you the happiest? Then give it a go. Do something simple. I’ll bet you’re surprised at how happy it makes you.

 

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For the last year plus, I set aside my love for clay. I just can’t call it pottery anymore because I don’t only throw bowls, platters, mugs, and plates now. I sculpt with it. I make a canvas out of clay and draw on it with glaze, creating magical paintings.

This break from clay began when I quit my old career. I felt like I needed to give everything to my writing and my new publishing business, so clay was set aside. And it was okay. I knew I would return when the time was right.

Well, the time has returned, and I’m back. That first night back in my beloved studio with other artists was a bit of a surprise. I discovered the shelf where I kept my tools going back many years had been cleaned out and thrown away. Everything I had assembled was gone. Even more shocking, few of my old friends were around. It was as if a hurricane had hit the studio and swept everything I loved away.

Except me and the clay.

I had to start over. Borrow tools. Find a new shelf.

The clay was the same though, that same mixture of strength and flexibility which allows me to mold it into something special that holds its shape over time.

But I wasn’t the same.

I sat down at the wheel for the first time in two years and wasn’t sure I could throw anymore. I had been sculpting and doing canvas on clay in the time before I had taken a break.

I wedged a modest amount of clay and centered it on the wheel. I stared at the lump without turning the wheel on to start my dance with centrifugal force. Then I hit the switch.

And was surprised. I hadn’t really forgotten how to do anything, and even better, I was ready to integrate my new talents with sculpture into my work on the wheel.

My first piece back is a coffee mug with a mermaid sculpted on the side. When she came out of the kiln a few days ago, I was elated. I’d returned to what I loved and produced something new because of all the gifts I’d integrated in my time away.

Happiness is Returning.

The return wasn’t perfect. My community, my place in the studio had been severed. But the clay was there, waiting for me.

I create with words all the time as a writer, something I’m doing even now, but I adore creating with something solid, something that isn’t language. It still touches the soul. The modality doesn’t change that.

What have you stopped doing that you loved that you haven’t returned to? Are you like I was thinking you might not be able to do it anymore?

Give it a try again. You might just find how happy your return to it makes you.

 

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I’m keeping it simple this week and focusing on how certain sounds make me happy. I love hearing them, and they never fail to make me smile.

Champagne popping.

A train whistle.

The sizzling of fajita meat.

Wind rustling the trees.

My name being called in a loving tone.

The voices of the ones I love.

Kids making car noises.

Dance music.

Happiness is sounds.

What are your favorite sounds? Quick. Just think of three. I’ll bet you’re already smiling.

 

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